what apocalypse?: bolts, beers, and bob marley

30 04 2009


the world hangs on the precipice of doom.  the economy is in shambles, robots are competing in jeopardy, and a pork-based epidemic is sweeping across the globe.  the last gasps of humanity flicker like whispers in th…. *wait a minute.  what’s that you say?  sport climbing?  at the red?  for a few months?  dude, i’m so in.*

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movie music motivation magic: you’re the best!

24 04 2009

in what might (but probably won’t) become a regular thing, we here at icftg.com have decided to end each week with a bit of motivational music movie magic music…magic.   this week’s feature is joe esposito’s Karate Kid classic ‘you’re the best’.  we’ve not only imbeeded the youtube footage, but we’ve also included the lyrics (with commentary).

enjoy your weekend and try not to chuff harder than you send.  you know who you are.

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i (kinda) feel bad for mutant strongmos

22 04 2009
good luck 5.15'ing your way past this thing

good luck 5.15'ing your way past this thing

seriously.  first of all, i’ve read a bunch of X-Men comics and from what i could tell being a mutant wasn’t all shooting energy beams out of your eyes or throwing explosive playing cards.  nope.  in those books, the ‘man’ sent giant robots (see above) to kill their mutant asses.   sorry, but no thanks.  terremer looks like a rad problem, but i see no reason to get chased by a robot army any sooner than i have to.  and trust me, if what i’m reading at geekologie proves to be even partially true, then we will all be looking over our shoulders for pissed off Roombas in the years to come:

As a pioneer in the emerging robot industry, iRobot’s goal is to drive innovation, serve as an industry catalyst and change the world by fueling the era of robots. (http://www.irobot.com/sp.cfm?pageid=74)

editors note: OMFG!  RUN!

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the routes doth call

20 04 2009


you ever look at pictures of sport climbing and say to yourself “man, that looks badass!”?

yeah, me neither.  i mean, why would i want to do several boulder problems in a row when i’m already having so much fun doing them in the single?  plus. if you need more than two hands to count the number of moves in a problem, it’s no longer climbing.  it’s math.

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fun with language: punter

16 04 2009

in places outside of kentucky this image refers to a 'douche bag'

as far as i can tell, to ‘punt’ means to blow a send you should have had in the bag.  this term typically rears its ugly head in narratives about ‘blowing onsights’, but it seems usable any time you fail just before clipping the chains or grabbing the outtro jug.    Read the rest of this entry »

learning things about stuff

14 04 2009
horses and hearts?  i

horses and hearts? now that is a ladies lady. i'd imagine there is probably a herd of mustangs enroute to their local country-western bar as i speak.

i’ve learned two things this week:

1) ‘the guy’ is not a douche bag.  i just talked to him on the phone and it turns out that we were arguing about completely different things.  like star wars aficionados discussing the ins and outs of space physics with trekkies, neither one of us really had a clue which space the other was referring to.  and by space i mean context and not the dark stuff in the sky that surrounds heaven.  and by heaven i mean the cloud city where jesus lives.  ah.  so much magic and so little time.  /sniffle.

so, yes, it seems the guy had been given some terribly inaccurate information about yours truly and – like so many interweb squabbles – it kinda got outta hand.  in fact, after a whopping hour-long conversation it turns out ‘the guy’ is really nice and very cool.  this just goes to show – AGAIN – turn based email doesn’t really allow for the same amount of conversational complexity as a live conversation.  i know.  i’m as shocked as you are.  edit: for some awesome lulz about interweb flamings check this out. NSFW.

2) kentucky bouldering season, like so many niche retail stores, has officially closed.  why you ask?  while i would like to blame this on obama and his economy mauling buddies leo tolstoy and karl marx,  i fear i cannot.  mostly because his buddies are long dead, and obama himself is about as marxist as a bus full of young republicans.  the only difference?  obama probably doesn’t tell ‘black’ jokes when nobody is around to cry foul.  but if he does – wow – that would be totally f***ing awkward for his staffers.   Read the rest of this entry »

my mission: check?

10 04 2009

this is how i train for being the spot light kentucky blogger

climbing is the most fun thing i’ve got going.  which is a shame because all the people in this J Crew catalog i’m looking at seem really happy and all they’re doing is standing around in clothes.  for sure, it’s clear there is not a climber amongst them.  so either i’m missing out on something or these kids are on drugs.  i’m inclined to go with the latter…and the former.

i’m probably right. Read the rest of this entry »