return to the fray: the fray return post

5 08 2009
look how much i've aged.  scareeeee.

look how much i've aged. scareeeee.

you know what really gets me amped to write about rockclimbing.  besides winning world cup events, putting up mind blowing first ascents, and designing my own line of climbing pants/shorts/jackets?


not climbing stats (5.12c/v8).  no.  i don’t care about achievement on rock anymore because i’m into enlightenment.  and i’m like WAAAAYYY good at it too.  i’d explain, but you probably wouldn’t understand.

no, when i say stats i mean important stuff like interweb hits and offsite links.  you know, business.  anyhow, i just looked at my numerical graph thingy and apparently i’m looking into the statistical barrel of my worst month of hits since early 2008.  and the only thing i hate worse than getting shot in the face is – you guessed it – getting shot with my own failure.  in the face.  fiery hot data packets of fail right in the kisser.

so, yeah.  clearly i’m not cool with this development.  in fact, i’m so uncool with it that i’m gonna try to change things.  not anything important, like, say, racism, health care, or the weird confluence of racism/health care chatter that keeps popping up every time i leave my house.

no.  i can’t change the world people.  i’m only one blogger.  but with my intense focus and these two rockcrushing (but still very charming) hands, i’m pretty sure i can get my numbers up.

so tell your friends.  i’m back.  and i’m willing to write for their attention.  as long as said attention doesn’t require:

1) stories about doing things.  i don’t do those.  things, i mean.  i just don’t.

2) stories about winning.  i do them, but they’re all lies.  clever self-serving lies.

3) stories about climbing culture.  because 15k people in brown pants don’t deserve analysis.

4) posts without a list.  because:

a) it’s my writing crutch y’all.

b) how will you know it was me?

c) because i can’t do this alone.

nice to see you again.





8 responses

7 08 2009

about time…look forward to future posts…
Don’t let it happen again.

10 08 2009
peter b

Don’t worry we kept your seat warm for you

10 08 2009

nice. funny thing is i’m completely out of things to write about. fray return fail.

11 08 2009
peter b

Sharma versus Ondra, climbing as Olympic sport, etc, etc

20 08 2009

*yawn* …where’s the new stuff? are you that busy pretending to be a pretend-professor that you are to leave us all high-and-dry out here in the web of world-widedness?

20 08 2009

shhh.. i’m trying to think.

21 08 2009

you get a lotta hits if you say catty things to children, and start fights with local businesspeople, and post links of twitter along with promises of boobs and stuff. always works for us…

21 08 2009

on* also, proofreading = death. don’t dit

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