Twilight and Rockclimbings

30 11 2009

worst clown name ever

while i had my reservations about watching a movie aimed squarely at 15 year old girls, i sometimes like to watch popular films so i can remind myself why i hate everyone (aside from all the perfectly rational objective reasons i garnered from my 37th reading of Ayn Rand’s Art Deco Rape Classic The Fountainhead).

for those who haven’t seen it, Twilight is a story about a family of clowns with super-powers who live with regular people outside the colorful confines of the circus.  but rather than just transfix us with their silly antics (HOW DID THEY FIT ALL THOSE CLOWNS INTO THAT RANGE ROVER???!!!???), the central tension of the film is how clown/human love is ruined by the agonies of repressed sexual desire.  it felt like watching a million clowns unsuccessfully trying to grab an out-of-control (i.e. “wacky”) water-hose.

in clown language that means 😦

anyhow.  i learned so much from the first film that i just had to see the follow-up New Moon. it was a mixed bag for me really.  on the down side, it turned out to be the exact same film as Twilight, but they just replaced clowns with werewolves.  on the upside – and this might be the most important thing ever –  i learned how to spot werewolves:

pants commercial? nope. werewolves from New Moon

werewolves don’t wear shirts.

which means…

climbing IS inherently dangerous.

twice over.

-t

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5 responses

30 11 2009
peter b

And then some. Grrr……

30 11 2009
thereverend

i just might have proof that you, too, professor . . . are a werewolf!!

but don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me… or is it?

30 11 2009
das bpc

i was almost killed by a hoard of 15yr old girls… and my wife and step mother… when i laughed out loud… often… at the first twilight movie.

i fear i would not survive a second.

unfortunately, i REALLY want to see the second one since i hardly laugh at ‘funny’ movies… it is really something special that a movie like this can give an old man the gigglefits… you know, laughter… best remedy n shit.

BRING ON THE BITCHWOLVES!

30 11 2009
tissuetendons

go see it. it’s hilarious. a lolercoaster of teen angst.

1 12 2009
das bpc

when they scramble up trees i cannot contain myself. it looks so amazingly hilariously retarded but it is supposed to look ultra dopegnarrad, i guess.

so psyched

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